Friday, September 25, 2009

The Adventures of Murder Squirrel


The creation of Murder Squirrel was designed early in the '09 season at Mt. Rainier. He arrived at the Paradise Inn Gift Shop very unexpectedly, in a box with thousands of his friends. It was an invasion of creepy plush rodents with beady eyes. Only Murder Squirrel was ghastly and cruel enough to fight his way in to the hearts of the employees at Rainier, leaving the others plush squirrels behind to be sold as slaves to the highest, child-like bidder. The above is the first picture of Murder Squirrel on the day of his creation. In the first days of his creation he terrorized the hotel guests by sitting threateningly in the gift shop window, peering out into the lobby with his knife gleaming until he was banned by the high king. Since then he has gone into hiding protected by all that revere him. Some nights he has hidden deep in the woods, camping, drinking to much beer and living dangerously by sitting to close the fire, his singed tail is scarred to prove it. Here's a crazy fact: while I have not summitted the mountain, Murder Squirrel has climbed the 14,411 feet up to the top of the volcano we live on together. Although I do not have them there are pictures to prove this. He is a wild one that Murder Squirrel. His most recent adventure was to the Puyallup Fair where he drank to many airplane shots before going on the Tilt-A-Whirl. As you can imagine he was quite a threat to eveyone who walked by him. When some teenagers behind us in the line touched him saying he was so cute. I made sure to respond, "I wouldn't do that if I were you, he's more dangerous than he looks."

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