Monday, February 6, 2012

A Taste of Retirement

To tell this story it must be told in the reverse as I am sitting at the Southwest Florida Airport in Fort Meyers awaiting my return flight to Maine. It is currently the most exciting part of my journey b/c what was suppose to be a ridiculous flight home with two layovers that was going to zigzag me east-west-east is now a lazy first class flight including a voucher for a free flight. Thank you Jesus (totally stated with my hands in the air and a refreshing Hallelujah! Amen! attached) and Bill (the Delta attendant who hooked me up with the fab accommodations). I would like to think this will be how retirement will treat me in the future and am damn glad karma is treating me to this little ice cream moment in real time!!

The title of my post is a tribute to the Q-tips that inhabit 90% of Naples. There was a moment sitting at a fountain on 5th Avenue in historic downtown Naples when I realized that I (as a person under 55) was the minority. Seriously, how am I suppose to pick up guys in a sea of grey hair which I admit is totally vain and ageist of me b/c beneath my tinted curls camouflages a natural powdered wig. I did have two men of a mature nature hit on me while watching the Super Bowl at the Tavern on the Bay. One of them had the audacity to tell me he was rich, "no really, I'm rich, and will be able to buy a new car when the Giants win." Bastard...first your rooting for the wrong team. No matter what I will always be an NE fan. He was totally insulted when I actually refused to give him a high five when NY got their first TD. Second, your rich... What?!!...who cares... you are talking to the wrong girl, honey. This is the girl who, driving by Naples' gorgeous mansions bordered by the beaches of the Gulf of Mexico and layered behind beautiful, ornamental landscapes, thought to herself, "this in no way appeals to me. I have no desire to live in a beautiful mansion. In fact, it gives me the hebejebes. Give me a little condo and a container garden and I would be truly content."

Nevertheless, I do see the appeal of taking a four month sunshine hiatus in the winter months because man, despite the clouds (never really saw the sun) it was the perfect temp for tank tops and shorts. The folks at the retirement community I was staying in (you have to be over 55 to own a condo in this little complex) have a laid back life where a schedule of aquatic exercise, zumba classes, games of dominoes and dips in the pool are top priorities of the day. I guess I'll just have to use my free flight to visit retirement again.

When I figure out how to download pics from my phone (couldn't find my camera for this trip) I will write more about my visit to Corkscrew Swamp Sanctuary and downtown Naples.